Two Years Ago...

When I was a little girl... I dreamt of the day I would hold my daughter in my arms... How we would play and giggle together. How I would protect her, nurture, make her smile and let her know how she was loved.... oh, how she was loved. As the years passed I became an adult. Still no daughter, the years turned into decades. The depth of my heartache beyond mere words.

I thought the dream, the hope, the prayer of holding my daughter in my arms would be just that.... that it would never be realized... Then, Jesus answered my prayer, He gave me the oil of joy for mourning and beauty for ashes.... He gave me you....................
When I was a little girl Jesus already knew who you were, where you were, how long I would have to wait, He always knew. He knew that it would be His grace that would get me through as I waited to find you. He knew that His love would keep you safe for the first 10 months of your life with out me. He knew that 2 years ago today, as I walked down that hallway in Nanchang, China and saw your precious face for the first time in person as I looked through the doorway that my heart would not be able to contain the love I felt for you my child... for it is far bigger than I. It is far more pure than humanly possible. It is a glimpse of the Father's perfect agappe love... it is pure and holy and beautiful.
You are my heart. You are my joy. You are my answered prayer, my heart's desire, my miracle. You are my daughter.
Your favorite story for me to read to you is, "Guess How Much I Love You?" Oh, sweet Hannah MeiLin, you will never truly know the depth of Mama's love for you until you too one day hold your precious child in your arms... then we will share yet another cherished bond between us... you will look at me I am certain. With tears in your eyes at the realization of how deeply, how truly, how whole hearted a Mother loves....
I love you my precious daughter... oh, how I thank Jesus for you. I pray you walk with Him and love Him each and every day of your life. He will never leave you nor forsake you my Baby Love. And oh, the plans He has for you... It may be difficult to wait upon Him at times... of this I know. But I promise you that He is faithful and His timing is perfect! That the blessings He wants to bestow upon you are far greater than your mind and your heart can ever imagine... if you ever doubt this just look in the mirror... You will see the almighty and loving hand of God there in the most beautiful, precious face a Mother was ever blessed to hold...
Thank You Jesus for each and every moment in the last two years that I have been blessed with being able to kiss away her tears, hold her in my arms, bring a smile to her face, and make the world a happy and safe place. Thank you Jesus for my most beloved daughter...
You are faithful my Lord.... and she was oh, so worth the wait...
To the Mama's whose arms are aching to hold their children in their arms... Stay the coarse. He will give you beauty for ashes...
God's Speed